HAPPY NEW YEAR

I know I am a little early but I doubt that I will get back on this side of 2009, so with this....

We would like to wish all of our Family and Friends

a very Happy New Year.

May you have a wonderful

time seeing in 2009,

don't wake up too early

or with a headache

but more importantly are

safe and with

us on January the 1st!!

Thankyou all for supporting us,

sharing friendship and

special times,

sharing our laughter and our tears

(especially mine).

May 2009 be a prosperous and

enjoyable year for one and all...

Love always and best wishes....

Noel, Jo, Oliver and Alex xxx

Christmas Day is over but the celebrations will continue....

I am sitting here typing this while my Mam and sister in law, Clare, have just opened there first bottle of wine for the day! I, however, need to wait a little longer before partaking in the best type of grape juice!! hahaha

As for yesterday, all DID go without a hitch!! It actually makes you sit back and wonder what all the worry was about beforehand.

The kids decided that their excitment couldn't wait until after 6am and that's when they woke us up! Alex was really happy that Santa had been but Oliver wasn't that happy as there was no table tennis table to be seen. He had his heart set on getting on and because it wasn't next to the Christmas tree in the loungeroom he had a dark cloud over his head... that was until he went outside and saw one under the verandah!!

I was spoiled by my family this year. Reduced to tears by their cards and gifts - I received a Galialo Thermometre, a toe ring, a necklace and an amazing quilt cover!! Wow - OMG I was very surprise at the thought that had gone into the present process this year.

Then it was all hands on deck to put the finishing touches to lunch, preparing the rest of the entree and the vegetables etc. We at one stage were surprised that we were ahead of ourselves and had time to have a quiet drink before the rest of the family arrived. And take photo's of our table before everyone sat down....

To my amazement, I must say... everyone arrived almost on time (due to the traffic on the freeway) and we sat down pretty much on time. We made sure everyone stayed inside until everyone was here just so our decorated area was a surprise to everyone all at once. Of course Mam, Noel and I wanted to see everyone's faces.. and I do believe they were amazed.
The fairies and the snowflakes just looked absolutely gorgeous glittering in the sunlight and the red and silver tinsel really complemented them.

Everyone sat down and the food fest began... I printed off a menu, tied it with red and silver ribbon for everyone to read whilst waiting for the entrees to be served with a thank you message at the bottom... it really was quite cheezy but something I wanted to do. Everyone liked them anyway. So overall, lunch was well received and Noel, Mam and I were happy with our efforts.


More presents after the feast - all children were definately spoiled from all sides. I couldn't believe some of the gifts that they received. And to top it off, Noel and I received Nigella Lawson's Christmas cookbook off Sharon as a thank you for Christmas Day and for all of the year... I am definately in my element when reading a cookbook! Thanks Sharon - this last year has definately been a pleasure having both you and Tom in our lives.

Sean and Vicky had to go off to Vicky's family for dinner. Personally, I couldn't eat another meal especially after the lunch we had so I did not envy the mere thought of it at all. Sharon, after a little snooze on the couch, went home with Tom and I hope that they both truly had a great time.

Not long after the Abba Sing Star (Alex's present) was opened and that was the start of the party. Alex, Mam, Clare, Mam and even Dad got into the act and belted out a few ABBA songs before Mam and Dad left as they are taking the caravan down to Port Fairy for Sean and Vicky's holiday. The rest of us then sang our hearts out and also played Guitar Hero (Oliver's present) until the wee wee wee hours of the morning. A few people surrounding me are not feeling the best but I suppose it just goes to show that a good time was had by one and all......

As usual too much food but lots of yummy leftovers. Today is quite quiet in comparision to yesterday for which most of us are glad. Noel and Alex have taken Clare up to one of her friends' houses, Mam is watching a Barbara Streisand DVD that she got for Christmas, Oliver is trying to work out who Barbara Streisand is, and I have to admit, I am now sipping on a Champagne Cocktail... well it is the Festive Season after all!!!

My husband has just returned from dropping Clare off and he is armed with two crayfish... so it looks like it's seafood for lunch!! OMG life is just soooooo hard!!

Merry Christmas and Happy New Year to you all............

Was my weekend better than Christmas? Nearly!!

I had such a wonderful weekend that it was nearly better than Christmas itself.

After picking Mam up from outside my sister's house (I didn't want to go inside so that was my choice) we went home where the kids just greeted Grandma with cuddles and excited chatter. It was wonderful to see all three faces beaming with love and joy. I quickly showed Mam around our new house as this was her first visit since the move, kindly asking her to put her blinkers on as it was quite a mess!! Not that she was bothered but I did explain that I wasn't expecting her and she understood.

Sharon was already at our house as we we had planned to go shopping. So quickly Mam and I got ready and off the 3 ladies went to battle Frankston. Surprisingly there wasn't really a battle. In actual fact we have found the shops quiet all weekend.

Mam came to work with me on Saturday morning, which for some strange reason she enjoys. I enjoy her company too, selfishly it's just the two of us and we can chat, etc. Saturday morning's mission was to wrap the presents we had already purchased to save one job on Christmas eve. That accomplished (thanks to Mam - you are a trooper!! MWAH!!) we closed the weighbridge and went down to the office where we were having my work breakup. There was a pig on a spit (a full pig) and it looked too good to eat. Mam was in awe of it and must say it tasted damn good as well. It was quite a casual affair but enjoyable to say the least.

More shopping on the way home but then we finally made it home much to Mam's delight. Neither of us like shopping (except for food shopping of course). Aimlessly wandering from shop to shop is not my idea of fun but at this time of year it's very hard not to do just that. Looking here and there for presents to jump of the shelf and say "pick me, pick me"!! However I did manage to pick up one layby.

Saturday night was special for Oliver as his mate, Kypton, from school rang in the afternoon to see if Oliver wanted to go for a sleepover. OF COURSE HE DID!! So it was just us and Alex. She adores Grandma and they sat watching the Christmas Carols together, we had all the candles/tealights lit around the loungeroom making it look special.

Another quick trip to the shops Sunday morning this time for the groceries. Then we had a bbq brunch before setting off on the next mission for the weekend. The mission, which we didn't have an option of accepting, it just had to be done was to tidy the patio area and decorate it for Christmas. Every year I do a different Christmas theme (everyone always comes to us for Christmas day). This year I had chosen the colours of red, silver and white and I had a vision in my head, that I had to describe to Noel and Mam, which didn't really describe my vision if you know what I mean. So I put all the tinsel and bags of ornaments on the table and asked for their help. We put up tinsel around the area where we will eat and then hung snowflakes and fairies everywhere. God it looks ace, it's perfect (even if I say so myself) it's the best we have ever done and will definately take some beating next year! According to Mam, my face said it all!! So did hers.... Thank you Noel and Mam, it wouldn't look this special without your input and help!!

(I will take photo's and post them here soon. I can't just yet as I need to surprise a few people who are coming for Christmas day.....and they read my blog!)

Last night all of us went out for Chinese with Mam and Dad meeting us there. It was great to see all three of our parents chatting away. I am so glad that since the day Noel and I met both families have gotten on really well. It was like watching long lost friends catching up last night. As usual the meal was great with all plates being devoured. The kids are staying at Nana and Grandad's now until Tuesday night so they went home with them. Mam, Noel and I came home and had a few drinks sitting under our newly decorated patio listening to some music. It was a relaxing yet brilliant way to finish off the weekend.

Finally it is Monday again and sadly I had to drop Mam back at Claire's. But it's only until Tuesday when I pick her up again after work and the doctors! I sent my nephew's Christmas presents off with Mam this morning. I would have dearly loved to give them to the boys myself, to see their faces and hopefully enjoyment from the gift but unfortunately it's not going to happen this year.

(Maybe things will change in the future but I can't sit around and wait. I need to get on with my life and that's what I intend to do. Hopefully this will be the last time that I mention this issue because the more I think about it the more it hurts and consumes me. I bet it's not bothering Claire one little bit. So that's it... no more!!)

As I mentioned I had such a wonderful weekend - I couldn't of wished for a better few days with mam and my family. I cannot wait for Christmas Day when we are all together again... thirteen of us blessing the table this year. Of course there is Noel, Oliver, Alex and me, the three grandparents, Grandma, Nana and Grandad, Clare (who flies in from Sydney on Christmas Eve), Sean, Vicky and Christian, Sharon and Tom. Hopefully Christmas 2009 will be a day that we all enjoy and remember!

The feelings of a Friday especially this Friday...

Okay so work is nearly over for the day.. have to kill 15 minutes and look busy! So no better time to post an update for the weekend.

Feeling rather emotional most of this morning - due to the fact that I am longing for that mother/daughter hug, drained from a week of Noel doing night shift and then there is that always nagging problem of my sister in the back of my head. Why can't I shift my thoughts? hhhmmm seriously need to work on that but then that would involve thinking about it....

Anyway this morning after speaking with Mam I have resigned myself to the fact that we wouldn't be seeing her until Tuesday evening. She had decided the right thing to do would be to spend time with Claire and her family. Heartbreaking as it was, I had to accept this fact considering big mouth here actually planted that thought seed the other day as a nice guesture only to ponder whether if the situation was reversed if Claire would have the same care factor as me... definately not is the answer I came up with!

But then the whole situation changed when my mobile rang and it was Mam. Considering the fact that Claire had made plans that Mam didn't want anything to do with so was ringing to ask if we could scap plan #1 and if she could come over to our house for the weekend? Like as if she had to ask at all!! Needless to say once I finish here at work I will be driving to my sisters, SMILING of course, to pick up Mam and take her to our happy (a little bit messy I must admit to) household.

The kids are going to be really excited to see Grandma again.. they asked about her last night so it will be great to see their faces light up when she walks in the door tonight.

Speaking of tonight we will be off shopping just the girls.... Mam, Sharon and me. So that should be an adventure in itself. Then its work for me in the morning and then my work breakup on site. This year it's a pig on a spit, bbq and salads etc. Afterwards better get to cleaning and decorating our outside area for Christmas day and ensuring everything else is in place for next Thursday.

But the best thing of all this weekend is Mam will now be with us until Monday morning....

Grandma arrives today.....

Cannot believe it's the 18th of December already. I just knew December was going to fly by and it has....

.

My mam arrives today from Brisbane. It seems like only yesterday I found out that my uncle had purchased her fares for her as her Christmas present many weeks ago and he was still in Wales then. He's up at her place now but not coming to Melbourne for Christmas. He has made many friends up on the island so that's where he prefers to be.

.

I am excited that Mam is arriving today. It has been too long since I saw her and I can't wait to have one of those mother/daughter hugs that are so special and it doesn't really matter how old you are!

.

Although I am excited, I am also sad. The reason I am sad is I am not sure when I will see my mam. As it's a Thursday today she will go straight to Claire's. That's the deal we all have when she visits. During the week, when we are working she stays at Claire's as Claire doesn't work. Then she comes to us on the weekends, normally on the Friday night and then goes back to Claire's on the Monday morning. This time I am not sure whether we will see Mam on Friday night. As Mam is spending Christmas with me and my family I actually suggested to Mam that she maybe stay with Claire over the weekend so she has some family time with them.

.

Plus there is the small fact that Claire and I still haven't spoken since I told her that I wasn't going to pretend to be happy families anymore. In fact, she hasn't acknowledged the SMS I sent after the last phone call. This is my text that I sent to her on 5/12/08:

"Forgot to ask when we were talking today - why? Why don't you want to associate with me or my family except for when Mam is here? Why don't you want to spend anytime with us? I suppose the overall question is - what have I done? Tell me please! Don't want to continue the way we have been. Would really like to resolve this and move on as a normal family - not a "special occassion" family. I really hope you will contact me soon but it's up to you now!"

Not too harsh I hope, just something I needed to do. The text, I suppose, was a condensed version of the letter that I sent her back in September by registered post that she didn't bother to collect from the post office and it was returned to me!!

.

Needless to say - I have heard nothing. I have had no reply. I am obviously not worthy of any form of explanation or even acknowledgement. I one sense, it confirmed everything.

.

Oh well, although it's eating me up inside I must not let it ruin Christmas for my family... so back to thinking happy thoughts!

The Thirteenth of December .....

Yesterday was the 13th December (I know that you all knew that) but in our family the 13th of December is a VERY special day for two reasons.

The first and most important reason is because it is my Dad's birthday - so...

"Happy Birthday Daddy!!

I love you dearly

and miss you still so much!"

Secondly, it is the twelth day before Christmas and the day that we put up our Christmas Tree and officially start of celebrating the Festive Season.

So when we were all finally home, somewhat organised after putting the shopping away and doing a little cleaning we all set to the task of putting up the tree. This year we had a special helper, Tom. Thanks for helping Tom! It, as usual, was fun. With Christmas music playing in the background we put the lights on the tree and then adorned the tree with decorations old and new.

Funnily enough, putting up the tree brought the buzz of Christmas into the House of Murray!!

2008 Christmas Concert!!

~~~~o0O0o~~~~

WOW!! The Christmas Concert at the school was ace this year. This year the concert was held outside, the school decided to use it's new grassed (synthetic) courtyard and it was such a better atmosphere being outside with a breeze instead of being all crammed into the stuffy hall. Great move on the school's behalf.

Every year each class gets up and sings 2 or 3 Christmas Carols each. Then Sants pays the school a visit giving all the kids an icypole and a little bag of lollies. It's bedlam normally at some parts of the evening but tonight it just seemed to go off so smoothly.

As I just mentioned the atmosphere was great. It didn't matter how loud the kids sang their carols as it didn't echo off the walls this year and everyone attending just seemed so much more relaxed. It was fantastic to see all the kids dressed up in their "christmas" outfits. There were Santa's, elves, rudolphs, red dresses, green shirts, tinsel aglore and even "rocker" angels!!

I must admit Alex is right at home on the stage.. maybe it's something worth looking into. She puts her whole heart into the songs, not only with the words but with the actions too. (Do I sound bias? I think so!! LOL!!)

Mam and Dad came to witness the festivities and as per usual some of the acts guaranteed a laugh. I love the way the littlee's know the chorus and sing it out at the top of their lungs only to mumble the verses.... and the funny little moves that they do up on stage. Their innocence is magic and as said, sometimes oh so funny.


Oliver was on stage for two songs with his class but sadly there was mainly only the grade 5's as the grade 6's didn't have to do it. I think that was a shame especially with them being in the last year of primary school. I understand that they are growing up and it's probably not "too cool" but afterall it's Christmas and I think it is such a special thing for all the kids to do. The 5/6's weren't as organised as some of the others but they did well! Oliver got into though which I suppose is the main thing. Got to love the baggy shirt and pants look - he had to be fashionable!!

Strangely the concert seemed to go quite quick this year but as I said it was more organised than previous years. I am glad it wasn't such a late night as the kids are so tired now that the school year is coming to a close - it's hard enough to get them up in the morning as it is......

~~~~o0O0o~~~~

A successful trip to the doctors.....

Yesterday both Alex and I had to go to the doctors.

Hooray for the second appointment in a row I was deemed "NORMAL" - correction my BP was.
Yesterday's reading was 130/80 so both the doctor and I were very happy. I don't have another appointment now until the 23rd December!! Frankly that should be interesting because by then I am sure that my BP will be sky high stressing over Christmas lunch (at our house) two days later!! hehehehe Still on the same tablets so I guess I will just have to remain calm and relaxed... HA as if?!?!?!


Alex was having some day surgery - having a wart removed from the back of her neck! She was so nervous that she was giggling and that in itself was very funny. All was good until she had the needed for the local! She screamed and screamed and burst into tears. Once I had her calm and she had no feeling in her neck the rest of the "operation" went really well. Today she is sporting 3 stitches, a large dressing and a huge smile as today she has "show and tell"!!

Tonight is the school concert, so I will be rushing home from work, picking up the kids from school, buying them McDonalds for dinner (yes I promised) and then getting back down the school for around 6.30pm. Noel's working overtime so he will come straight from work. Should be a really interesting night - I know that I am looking forward to it.

Survey of 100 things....

Just something light-hearted for today....

I have just read this on another blog that I read, Mummifiedtimesfive, and thought it would be an interesting survey to undertake. Not sure of it's origin but I would say it's American considering some of the items.

The rules are quite simple. Below is a list of 100 statements. All you need to do is bold the ones you have done.

1. Started your own blog
2. Slept under the stars
3. Played in a band
4. Visited Hawaii
5. Watched a meteor shower
6. Given more than you can afford to charity.
7. Been to Disneyland
8. Climbed a mountain.
9. Held a praying mantis
10. Sang a solo
12. Visited Paris
13. Watched a lightning storm at sea
14. Taught yourself an art from scratch
15. Adopted a child
16. Had food poisoning
17. Walked to the top of the Statue of Liberty
18. Grown your own vegetables
19. Seen the Mona Lisa in France
20. Slept in an overnight train
21. Had a pillow fight
22. Hitchhiked
23. Taken a sick day when you’re not ill
24. Built a snow fort
25. Held a lamb
26. Gone skinny dipping
27. Run a marathon
28. Ridden in a gondola in Venice
29. Seen a total eclipse (solar)
30. Watched a sunrise or sunset
31. Hit a home run
32. Been on a cruise
33. Seen Niagara Falls in person
34. Visited the birthplace of your ancestors
35. Seen an Amish community
36. Taught yourself a new language
37. Had enough money to be truly satisfied
38. Seen the Leaning Tower of Pisa in person
39. Gone rock climbing
40. Seen Michelangelo’s David
41. Sung karaoke
42. Seen Old Faithful geyser erupt
43. Bought a stranger a meal at a restaurant
44. Visited Africa
45. Walked on a beach by moonlight
46. Been transported in an ambulance
47. Had your portrait painted
48. Gone deep sea fishing
49. Seen the Sistine Chapel in person
50. Been to the top of the Eiffel Tower in Paris
51. Gone scuba diving or snorkeling
52. Kissed in the rain
53. Played in the mud
55. Been in a movie
56. Visited the Great Wall of China
57. Started a business
58. Taken a martial arts class
59. Visited Russia
60. Served at a soup kitchen
61. Sold Girl Scout Cookies
62. Gone whale watching
63. Got flowers for no reason
66. Visited a Nazi Concentration Camp
67. Bounced a check
68. Flown in a helicopter
69. Saved a favorite childhood toy
70. Visited the Lincoln Memorial
71. Eaten cavier.
72. Pieced a quilt
73. Stood in Times Square
74. Toured the Everglades
75. Been fired from a job
76. Seen the Changing of the Guards in London
77. Broken a bone
78. Been on a speeding motorcycle
79. Seen the Grand Canyon in person
80. Published a book
81. Visited the Vatican
82. Bought a brand new car
83. Walked in Jerusalem
84. Had your picture in the newspaper
85. Read the entire Bible
86. Visited the White House
87. Killed and prepared an animal for eating
88. Had chicken pox
89. Saved someone’s life
90. Sat on a jury
91. Met someone famous
92. Joined a book club
93. Lost a loved one
94. Had a baby
95. Seen the Alamo in person
96. Swam in the Great Salt Lake
97. Been involved in a lawsuit
98. Owned a cell phone
99. Been stung by a bee
100. Read an entire book in one day

Okay 33 out of 100 isn't too bad I suppose.... there are a few more on the list I could mark off if I put my mind to it..

Let me know if you have a go at the survey????

December is becoming a blur.....

December is becoming a blur… no faster am I doing things, getting organised and prepared than they are getting done or happening and then that’s them over, mostly with no evidence of the effort put into them.

Plus on the down side I am still quite consumed with my sister and our issues, she hasn’t made contact with me and to be totally honest I actually expect that she won’t. As I said the other day I just need to move on, accept was has happened and don’t hold my breath of a miracle happening in the near future!

However, I finally got time to sit down and send a quick email to Nea, in New Zealand. She probably thinks that I had disappeared into a crack somewhere but as I did try to explain to her it’s just that at the moment we have been so, so busy. I felt so bad for not writing to her sooner! Sorry, Nea!!

Speaking of time (or lack of) I have been that overwhelmed that I haven’t even written my Christmas Cards – in fact I haven’t even thought of doing them. Might have to send out “Happy New Year” cards – lol!! So sorry to any of you out there reading this…..

This week sees me back at the doctor’s tomorrow night for my fortnightly BP check-up! Alexandria also has an appointment for a little bit of day surgery (having a wart removed from the back of her neck – it’s in her hair line and bothers her quite a lot). Cross fingers that she won’t scream the doctor’s surgery down like she did when we got her cast removed from her leg!

Thursday night is the school’s Christmas Concert at 7pm. Should be an interesting evening, it normally is. The school go to quite some effort. This year, if the weather remains nice, the concert will take place in the Sherlock Courtyard and not in the stuffy hall! Each class sings 2 – 3 songs, there are raffles for Christmas Hampers and of course, Santa comes and brings all the kids a bag of lollies and an icypole. Nana and Grandad attend every year also, which makes the kids feel so special and of course, excited.

Saturday is our special day. The 13th of December is the day our family always puts up the Christmas tree … signalling the 12 days of Christmas. (We take it down on the 6th January – another 12 days). Just the mere thought of putting up the Christmas Tree makes me feel that Christmas is officially on its way.

To be honest I don’t really get that excited about Christmas when the decorations first appear in the shops as all the special holidays (Christmas and Easter especially) are becoming too commercialised not to mention too early but when Noel puts all the lights up outside, we start baking and menu planning Christmas lunch, organising special presents, etc - it all just seems to bring that inner feeling of excitement – you know that feeling you get when you are a kid and something exciting is about to happen?

Friday, Saturday and Sunday nights so far we have not a thing firmly planned except of course for the usual grocery shopping and at some stage I must pull my finger out and get some Christmas Present shopping done. Thankfully the majority of it is already on layby but then there are quite of few of the “little” things still to organise. (At the moment it just all seems never ending).

There are Christmas Carols up at Casey Fields on Saturday night, which I wouldn’t mind attending (they even have fireworks) but would much prefer to go to a Carols in Frankston but I haven’t seen any advertised – must keep looking. Will have to check with Alison if she knows of any happening locally.

Mind you saying that we have nothing planned doesn’t mean that they are our final plans for the weekend (everyone who knows us is witness to our “spur of the moment” planning hehehe) - there are so many people we need/want to catch up with before the whirlwind of Christmas consumes us completely, and I am trying to plan it so we do catch up with them even if it’s only for a quick drink.

Better go as I said, lots to do…..

Finally I was strong so why do I feel like shit?

After picking myself up off the floor on Wednesday because my sister rang me to actually thank me for my nephew's birthday card that I sent, we had a little chat and then she asked if me and my family would like to go for dinner at their house the night that Mam arrives. Now that pissed me off.... here we go again "happy families" because Mam is here! I told her I would see and get back to her.

Anyway after mulling over my options since Wednesday I finally made my decision.

I rang her this morning. It was hard as I tried to be strong and sound positive whilst holding back tears. I thanked her for her invitation, told her that we would not be coming because I don't want to play "happy families" anymore just because Mam is visiting when she cannot be bothered to contact me any other time of the year and basically that I have given up trying to invite them for dinner, etc. I did say that I wished more than anything that we could be friends and even sisters.

All she could say was "I know what you mean"!!!

I suggested if she wanted to discuss this just the two of us could go for a coffee if she wanted to.

The phone conversation ended with "will talk to you later" then the dial tone! No goodbyes just a hang up.....

I know that something needed to be done as I cannot continue with all the heart ache and the hoping that the situation will just miraculously change one day and we will behave like a normal family again.

In a way I think I may have acted selfishly and put my feelings first but it hurts to know that she is so close, wants nothing to do with me, doesn't want to interact with me or my family and only contacts me for special occasions (birthdays etc.) or when Mam is down visiting hence the "happy families" label!

Not only do I feel sorry for me though.... it's not all about me! I feel sorry for the 6 kids involved. My kids don't know their cousins and their cousins don't know them!!! They are going to grow up not knowing each other and that is really sad!!!

The only thing I regret about the phone call is that I didn't ask her what I did to make her not want to associate with me or my family?

It's not going to change, I know that now.... and although it hurts I must get on and enjoy my life!

Guess what?

Guess what - it's Monday again!! hahahaha (bet you thought I had a secret!)

Once again another weekend has flown. Managed to get a few things done around the house - nothing earth moving though. A little cleaning, a little relaxing, played scrabble on facebook whilst the kids watched a dvd, helped with some homework, but most of all I got my cwch! Several infact and they were all nice.

We did manage to go shopping - popped into a few shops we haven't been to for awhile. Found a new indian food shop in Carrum Downs. Checked out the Warehouse - oh and we even bought an inflatable chimney complete with Santa's legs to put on the roof!!

Noel has been very busy with putting the lights up over the weekend and even today (he has an RDO) he bought some more lights so it will be interesting to see what they look like tonight! Oliver actually told Noel yesterday "That you are the best dad in the world and you are doing a great job with the lights!" I know that this meant a lot to Noel.






(Thankfully this is no longer on our bed and it is on the roof!! The legs go up and down and I must say it looks quite good. Look at my man... proud as punch!)